Four days into 2019 and time to set some goals!
After thinking long and hard about what I wanted to accomplish for 2019, I realized that most of my goals have more to do with self acceptance than self improvement. Obviously we always want to be improving ourselves daily, but for me I think the focus this year is going to be about being happy with myself “improved” or not.
SO this year I have set the following GOALS for 2019:
1. Stop caring about what everyone else thinks
This has honestly been my biggest struggle. I am constantly asking myself: What will they think of this post? Will they make fun of this outfit? Are they disapproving of a decision that I make as a mom?
WHY? I need to STOP THIS.
Also, who is “they”? I have a few close friends and I have my family but other than that what do I really care if Barbara screenshots my insta and sends it to Barbara-2 with a green faced barf emoji? (Side note: Barbara’s are the people of the world who make us feel in such a way that we need to be setting “stop caring” goals).
We only have x amount of days on this earth and none of that time should be spent second guessing ourselves.
At the end of the day my son is happy and healthy, I have a good job, a successful marriage and a beautiful home — not doing too shabby. Nothing else should matter. Especially not the opinion of “Barbara”s
2. Kick Start Mom Blogging Career
I have been admiring all of these other strong successful women around me creating blogs, producing content, becoming influencers, etc. and I have been holding back because I have so much self-doubt (also so much “care” what other people think- refer back to #1) and again WHY?! If they can do it I can do it. The only thing that has been holding me back is myself.
Throughout my pregnancy and first year as a mom I basically worshipped other people’s new- mom advice and blog posts. I read about different baby products and tips and tricks to get your kid to sleep — why can’t I do that for someone else?
STOP DOUBTING YOURSELF. And by yourself I mean me. I need to listen to my own advice.
3. No more guilt
We all f**** up. Two weeks ago I ran to answer the door (it was a FedEx package I had been waiting for) and as I picked up Thomas and raced out of the room I smacked his head on the doorframe. Ideal? No. But it happens. We all make mistakes. There are always going to be accidents. But let’s stop killing ourselves over it. Learn from your mistakes. Grow. Move on.
4. Be a better spouse
This one might be the toughest. Parenting is not easy. Being a parent while being a good spouse is nearly impossible. Since Thomas was born I swear Micheal and I act more like roommates than husband and wife. We need to work on that. I read a quote the other day that really hit home, “love doesn’t just sit there like a stone. It has to be made like bread; remade all the time, made new” and it’s SO TRUE. Relationships are hard work and you can’t give up on the work part and expect things to be peachy at home. Never go to sleep angry. Try not to raise your voice. And make time for date night once a week. Believe it or not, there was a time where you actually did like each other. Let’s get back to that place.
5. Quit smoking.
No explanation here. Smoking is gross. It’s bad for me and bad for my family and I don’t even want to admit that I smoke which is even more of a sign that I need to quit. Quitting. Go.
6 Self care
I want to make 2019 a year where I really learn to love myself. It’s so important to be happy in your skin and sometimes I forget to focus on myself. Mom guilt is real (add this to the stop feeling guilty #3) and it’s so hard for my to justify leaving Thomas to go to a yoga class or get my nails done- and yeah, getting your nails done isn’t more important than spending time with your kid- but feeling like a human again and having something to kick your confidence up a notch will make you a better mom at the end of the day. Happy mom, happy baby (And husband. And dog. And coworker. And anyone else lucky enough to meet you during the day).
Not sure if these resolutions are all too specific to my own life for anyone else to relate but typing them out has forced me to take a look at what I really need to work on this year and hopefully that is enough to put them into motion.
2019 let’s do this